Author: ariakerstein

there is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so…  

– Hamlet

Improving one’s quality of life requires expanding the space between stimulus and response (I picked that up at a buddhist lecture years ago and it stuck). For me the tool for doing this is reflection of some sort. This can take the form of sitting meditation, which I love, but more typically occurs while walking, running, swimming in the freezing pacific ocean!

I did a tai chi class the other day. What struck me about this is a feeling of rootedness. You aren’t moving much, certainly not compared to running a marathon. That said there’s something interesting about mastering one’s own ‘frame’ as it’s called, basically what’s in arms reach. In Tolstoy’s how much land does a man need the protagonist seeks all this land/fortune, but in the end the punch line is:

I’ve got a 10cm mass in my small intestine. The diagnosis is non-hodgkins lymphoma but I’m not sure what stage it’s in. This week will consist of another battery of tests to pinpoint the diagnosis: ct scan, pet scan, bone marrow biopsy (which I hear is awful). From there we’ll start discussing the treatment specifics.…

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